Riv, proud to be a CPC'er and an American!

The Night Before Crossfit By Jeff Baker

T’was the night before Crossfit, when all through the house
River wasn’t stirring, not even a mouse;
The jump ropes were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Glassman soon would be there;
The students were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of “Fran” danced in their heads;
And Eric in his ‘kerchief and Traver in his cap,
Had just settled down for a long winters nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I burpeed from my bed to see what was the matter;
Away to the window I broad jumped like a flash,
I snatched open the shutters, I thrustered up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the luster of mid-day objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver, so lively and handsome,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Glassman.
More rapid then sprinters his coursers they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name;
“Now, Angie!  Now, Annie!  Now, Jackie and Cindy!
On, Karen!  On, Jason! On, Joshie and Randy!
To the top of the porch!  To the top of the wall!
Now dash away!  Dash away!  Dash away all!”
As dry leaves that before a wild Crossfitter fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of equipment and St. Glassman too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof.
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Glassman came with a bound.
He was dressed rather plainly and his muscles were taught,
And his hands were all tarnished with torn calluses and chalk;
A bundle of equipment he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
His eyes – how they twinkled!  His dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the stubble on his chin was as white as the snow;
The stump of his pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the ganja smoke encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a little round belly.
That shook, when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly.
He was short and squat, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had something to dread;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And he filled in the white board; and turned with a jerk,
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod up the chimney he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
“Merry Crossfit to all, and to all a good-night.”

Today’s Workout: The 12 Days of Christmas – CPC Style
12) Squats
11) Double Unders
10) DB Push Press
9) Box Jumps
8 KB Swings
7) Knees to Elbows
6) Burpees
5) Pull ups
4) Ring Dips
3) Weighted Sit ups
2) Handstand Push ups
1) Muscle Up

Round 1 = 12 Squats
Round 2 = 12 Squats, 11 Double Unders
Round 3 = 12 Squats, 11 Double Unders, 10 DB Push Presses etc.